(my fifth grade photo because we're just going to lay out all the awkwardness down ahead of time)
When I was little I imagined age 28 to be the perfect year. I'm not sure how I came to this number - which probably means I read a book and the character was 28 and she was glorious. I imagined my life at 28-30 to be something like this:
I would have my doctorate in marine biology and, like Eugenie Clark, would be heralded as the Shark Lady. Unlike my hero, however, when traveling in Japan I would have made it absolutely clear to everyone that I was not to be served shark at whatever the cost (or fish or crustaceans for that matter - Except for the once every two year salmon I can't seem to escape at some fancy dinner I didn't order, I haven't eaten fish since I was 12. I have never eaten shrimp or lobster or crab, and I don't plan to).
I would travel the world swimming in waters with my armor, or in cages, or in those clear tubes even (I didn't dream in those days people like Nigel would be swimming FREE with Great Whites, but had I known I would have wanted to be there, too). I was to be the Great White's (my favourite of all the species) greatest protector. I would find safer and more effective forms of shark repellent so people wouldn't feel the need to hunt them to extinction.
I wasn't going to be married at this time, or have children, I was far too busy playing and saving the world. I did imagine, however, some attractive oceanographer would find his way easily into my life at least for a time. I would be living in San Diego, the most wonderful of all sparkly cities, near my grandparents and we would visit all the time when I wasn't in Australia doing research.
I had been so certain from the moment I knew marine biology existed (6? 8?) that I would be involved. I had no side plans. I did not allow for any other dream for a very long time.. not until I entered college and realized my teachers were right.... maybe I should go into English. I even had a few college professors ask me the same thing (mainly religion professors).
I was stubborn about it even then... which to this day doesn't make sense since I've always wanted to write a novel. BUT I was smart enough to drop out of the Biology program quickly, bumping my History minor to a major. And ended up with this odd, but not entirely planned for degree in History with a double minor in Biology and Religion.
(Stella and I after my college commencement)
What in the blazes was I to do with this? Continue in school? I'm smart enough but I didn't really think I could handle a thesis of any sort. Or Teach? No, I refused to teach. I would be dreadful. No body wants a tattooed woman with a vocabulary that could shame a sailor teaching their children, and certainly not one with patience issues.
(some of my tattoos for you to enjoy)
Instead I would maybe go into special events (don't ask me where I pulled that one from, maybe from watching too many movies about women with money) and I certainly would own a bookstore when I retired (which I still plan on doing, but maybe before retirement age).
So this Sunday, as I stare into next Saturday and my 30th birthday, I find I'm not entirely surprised it has taken me this long to become more comfortable in my skin, in my capabilities, and how to use them. How do I use them?
(our Special Events Department at the 2008 Holiday Party)
I currently hold a post working in Special Events; I love organizing and can't wait to begin a organization consultation business of my own; I love to craft and have finally found a niche which allows me creativity but doesn't take me a lifetime to complete, realized I love it so much I should open my own little world in
etsy (
which I have done).
My writing is flourishing thanks to this blogging sphere and the amazingly inspiring, creative and intelligent women I've stumbled upon, stalked, and with whom I have become blog friends; I am working, again, on my own novel and even scratched down thoughts for an entirely new story just the other night.
And where am I? No, not in the sparkliest of cities, but in a small town not far from where I grew up, still surrounded by friends who knew me when I was a very awkward chubby cheerleader in middle school, or even the girl in kindergarten with long frizzy thick hair down to her butt.
I have a pseudo-husband (not something I imagined in a million years) and I have a child. I have been granted my very own person to mold and teach, although it seems much more likely she picked me as her very own person to mold and teach.
(Aurora Grace - my very own grace and light)
And 30! I am quite in awe of the year already and can't wait to see what else it brings!
