is here. It's that time of year again - the time when some of the coolest people on the planet and the universe reign. Well, we always reign, but it's a bit more noticeable when we all lose our heads celebrating our birthdays.
Some of you may have heard about these crazy people in.. where are they? Wisconsin? (If they are they should have other things to worry about right now...) deciding our ancient and wise astrology was wrong, and I am actually a Capricorn.
I'm here to say emphatically I am NO such thing (and if I hear any of you call me that again I'll use my masterful powers of evil glariness on you).
Some people just don't have anything better to do with their time then to try change things that are SET in the STARS. Remember poor Pluto? Yea, THOSE kind of people.
The wonderful thing about astrology is how completely different we (I am speaking most for Aquarians at this moment) all are and yet how absolutely magnetized we are by each other.
I have many many important fellow Aquarians in my life. And as I realized who each of them were it gave me a pleasant chuckle to enjoy with the universe. This month is going to get crazy. Not only do I have our biggest (biennial) event at work (which makes my brain implode on a daily basis), but also so many fun activities.
So far on the schedule is sweetheart crafting night, ice-skating (!god help me!) with costuming, Aquarian birthday bash, Super-Bowl (don't have telly, which means I need to find someplace to watch), my birthday, and movie read-through.
So another biggie is to get internet at home (so I can keep you updated) and take lots of photos!
What are YOUR big plans for this lovely futuristic time of love and world peace?
28.1.11
26.1.11
Musicals, Movies, and My Life
My life is incredibly musical. It is such a shame I never picked up a useful instrument knowledge. I constantly have music playing. Silence hurts my head a lot. So when there isn't music on (even when I'm reading) there must be a movie on.
Lately is has been musicals. Although since the move my movie collection has severely diminished. Lots of "Mama Mia" and "Phantom of the Opera". I have no doubt the neighbors (who I can hear closing their cupboards and starting their microwave) LOVE me belting out like I'm Christine Daae or the fifth Swede.
And speaking of movies.. some of you might recall my movie debut in "Want Ad". Well, my fame is increasing. Another movie has been written. I have been cast, although I am not sure as what - like it matters. I'm ecstatic! This insanely enthralling and fun-filled venture has been so transformative for me.
After years of wanting and pretending to try to lose weight the movie was the catalyst. And I plan on being, at least a little buff, for the next one. So lots of visits to the gym and lots more jogging. Oh, how I detest jogging.
So you get to look forward to lots of news over the upcoming few months about the amazing motiviation of knowing your face is going to be 40 feet big. Also lots of hoping I get to scream in this one.
Lately is has been musicals. Although since the move my movie collection has severely diminished. Lots of "Mama Mia" and "Phantom of the Opera". I have no doubt the neighbors (who I can hear closing their cupboards and starting their microwave) LOVE me belting out like I'm Christine Daae or the fifth Swede.
And speaking of movies.. some of you might recall my movie debut in "Want Ad". Well, my fame is increasing. Another movie has been written. I have been cast, although I am not sure as what - like it matters. I'm ecstatic! This insanely enthralling and fun-filled venture has been so transformative for me.
After years of wanting and pretending to try to lose weight the movie was the catalyst. And I plan on being, at least a little buff, for the next one. So lots of visits to the gym and lots more jogging. Oh, how I detest jogging.
So you get to look forward to lots of news over the upcoming few months about the amazing motiviation of knowing your face is going to be 40 feet big. Also lots of hoping I get to scream in this one.
25.1.11
An Anchor: Sleep, Part II
In “The God of Small Things” there is the theory that things that are dreamt are real. I agree they must be. What the brain perceives to be real, MUST in fact be real to us. My emotions are real. They do not change when I wake up. I have woken up yelling in anger and not gotten over a dreamt fight for days.
The other night I dreamt I was in a bit of a mystery and there was much water. Our car crashed into a river. And Robert Pattinson was quite taken with me. I can’t really blame him. I was quite taken with him. And because I always have very innocent dreams (and I’m not at all being sarcastic, I really do have just wonderfully childish dreams where boys are concerned) just as we managed to get out of the car and are about to kiss the neighbor slammed the door and I awoke. Disgruntled, but still delighted I fell back asleep and can’t complain too much because I continued the dream, but my brain replaced Robert Pattinson with David Duchovny. All in all a pretty good night!
I have dreamt a handsome pirate prince fell in love with me long before the Pirates trilogy. I woke from that dream in tears because he drowned and I held his lifeless body in my arms. I have danced with Mr. Darcy on numerous occasions, although only once have we kissed. The second almost kiss was interrupted by two troublesome faculty with whom I work. I was very grumpy the next time I saw them.
I have stood in my basement with a shotgun and terror in my heart as I stared at my daughter wondering how in the hell I was going to get her out of the zombie apocalypse and to some place safe. If there was any place safe. I have been bitten by a zombie and broken into a quarantined area and discovered something to prolong the need to eat human flesh. I highly recommend stocking up on Gatorade and lots of protein if the zombie plague hits.
I have had jumping dreams a lot over my life. I can’t really fly. I can, however, jump and suspend myself in the air for incredibly long periods of time. Unfortunately, it usually ends with me getting in over my head and going so high (I’m scared of heights and over lodge pole pines is much too much) I just panic and don’t know how to let myself back down.
While I was pregnant, and after I learned to sleep through Aurora kicking me, I dreamt she kicked her little feet right through my stomach and I was NOT very happy. I shoved her feet back in and went to the doctor’s and they stitched me back together as I snarked Aurora repeatedly for coming out too early.
Two of my favourite dreams starred Jimmy Morrison. His beautiful long hair and impossible poetry. And I would say he was a figment of my imagination, but I don’t think he could have been. His words meant too much.
I have been abducted by aliens and rescued by Mulder and Scully. I’m pretty sure although I have kissed Mulder many times I have only kissed Scully once. I have acted in an X-Files and tried desperately to play it cool in front of David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson. I have swam with sharks and buried my best friend. I have driven drunk and been rescued by a high school crush. I have been trapped in a river of hot lava and woke myself by praying out loud.
I have even, only once, died in a dream, which I believed impossible. It happened at A Perfect Circle concert. It was the most horrible feeling. It took me weeks to get over my death and only when the real concert was canceled did I breathe a sigh of relief. I will never see A Perfect Circle in concert, as much as it pains me, my fear of the prophecy is too immediate.
I revel in dreams. I want to live in a dream, which means saying yes to more things, but feeling comfortable saying no when necessary.
Anyone interested in having a dream day with me? Once a week let's post a dream from recent nights. Don't forget to start a dream journal to help you with remembering details! See you in my dreams if not before!
xo
The other night I dreamt I was in a bit of a mystery and there was much water. Our car crashed into a river. And Robert Pattinson was quite taken with me. I can’t really blame him. I was quite taken with him. And because I always have very innocent dreams (and I’m not at all being sarcastic, I really do have just wonderfully childish dreams where boys are concerned) just as we managed to get out of the car and are about to kiss the neighbor slammed the door and I awoke. Disgruntled, but still delighted I fell back asleep and can’t complain too much because I continued the dream, but my brain replaced Robert Pattinson with David Duchovny. All in all a pretty good night!
I have dreamt a handsome pirate prince fell in love with me long before the Pirates trilogy. I woke from that dream in tears because he drowned and I held his lifeless body in my arms. I have danced with Mr. Darcy on numerous occasions, although only once have we kissed. The second almost kiss was interrupted by two troublesome faculty with whom I work. I was very grumpy the next time I saw them.
I have stood in my basement with a shotgun and terror in my heart as I stared at my daughter wondering how in the hell I was going to get her out of the zombie apocalypse and to some place safe. If there was any place safe. I have been bitten by a zombie and broken into a quarantined area and discovered something to prolong the need to eat human flesh. I highly recommend stocking up on Gatorade and lots of protein if the zombie plague hits.
I have had jumping dreams a lot over my life. I can’t really fly. I can, however, jump and suspend myself in the air for incredibly long periods of time. Unfortunately, it usually ends with me getting in over my head and going so high (I’m scared of heights and over lodge pole pines is much too much) I just panic and don’t know how to let myself back down.
While I was pregnant, and after I learned to sleep through Aurora kicking me, I dreamt she kicked her little feet right through my stomach and I was NOT very happy. I shoved her feet back in and went to the doctor’s and they stitched me back together as I snarked Aurora repeatedly for coming out too early.
Two of my favourite dreams starred Jimmy Morrison. His beautiful long hair and impossible poetry. And I would say he was a figment of my imagination, but I don’t think he could have been. His words meant too much.
I have been abducted by aliens and rescued by Mulder and Scully. I’m pretty sure although I have kissed Mulder many times I have only kissed Scully once. I have acted in an X-Files and tried desperately to play it cool in front of David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson. I have swam with sharks and buried my best friend. I have driven drunk and been rescued by a high school crush. I have been trapped in a river of hot lava and woke myself by praying out loud.
I have even, only once, died in a dream, which I believed impossible. It happened at A Perfect Circle concert. It was the most horrible feeling. It took me weeks to get over my death and only when the real concert was canceled did I breathe a sigh of relief. I will never see A Perfect Circle in concert, as much as it pains me, my fear of the prophecy is too immediate.
I revel in dreams. I want to live in a dream, which means saying yes to more things, but feeling comfortable saying no when necessary.
Anyone interested in having a dream day with me? Once a week let's post a dream from recent nights. Don't forget to start a dream journal to help you with remembering details! See you in my dreams if not before!
xo
21.1.11
An Anchor: sleep, part I
I have been thinking about sleeping. A lot. I am not sure if it is my brain's way of telling me to get more of it, or just that I need better sleep, or just to enjoy it when I can.
I have slept most everywhere. Although I must admit sleeping anywhere was a lot easier when I was younger.
I have slept across a washer and dryer (I was at a camp and needed to claim them to do laundry and was also very sleepy). I have slept on a radiator cover (which was utterly disastrous because the cover fell open and landed with a thud and an awkward crunch as it smashed my much needed glasses). I have slept in hotel room chairs (curled into the teeniest ball I could with the ottoman to use for any overhang, and, of course, with my arse and knees there was overhang).
I have slept hung over in an airport (with my ever trusty Fluffy as a pillow). I have fallen asleep under the bed with a dog (much to my parents’ dismay). I have slept across the foot of a bed (because there were too many people sleeping length wise for me to fit anywhere else). I have slept in a dorm lobby (far too many nights and sometimes with custodians vacuuming at 6:00 a.m. around me).
I have always been a night owl and an early riser, and now that I'm older I can rarely nap (unless sheer exhaustion hits), but I have the most vivid dreams. They are so delicious. Even the scary ones. I crave dreams. Because if your brain tells you something is real then it IS real, right?
I have slept most everywhere. Although I must admit sleeping anywhere was a lot easier when I was younger.
I have slept across a washer and dryer (I was at a camp and needed to claim them to do laundry and was also very sleepy). I have slept on a radiator cover (which was utterly disastrous because the cover fell open and landed with a thud and an awkward crunch as it smashed my much needed glasses). I have slept in hotel room chairs (curled into the teeniest ball I could with the ottoman to use for any overhang, and, of course, with my arse and knees there was overhang).
I have slept hung over in an airport (with my ever trusty Fluffy as a pillow). I have fallen asleep under the bed with a dog (much to my parents’ dismay). I have slept across the foot of a bed (because there were too many people sleeping length wise for me to fit anywhere else). I have slept in a dorm lobby (far too many nights and sometimes with custodians vacuuming at 6:00 a.m. around me).
I have always been a night owl and an early riser, and now that I'm older I can rarely nap (unless sheer exhaustion hits), but I have the most vivid dreams. They are so delicious. Even the scary ones. I crave dreams. Because if your brain tells you something is real then it IS real, right?
20.1.11
Zombie Plague Hits Montana
We knew it would strike somewhere right? I think it MIGHT have been those two infected (owl)ies I took in my carry-on, but you know the TSA didn't seem to care if I was bringing the plague with me.. only if I had more than 3 fl oz. of hair gel (which I didn't, but goo thing they double checked).
The Montana trip began with some zombiefied (owl)ies, a little "Zombieland" and being locked in the morgue. Oops. Actually, as the door clicked shut it was more like, "Oh {expeltive deleted}."
The Montana trip began with some zombiefied (owl)ies, a little "Zombieland" and being locked in the morgue. Oops. Actually, as the door clicked shut it was more like, "Oh {expeltive deleted}."
Except I couldn't get through this door either.
This isn't my first morgue, but thought I should include the dread duck lips for Brandy.
Then we went to ZombieTools. Well, at least their workshop. And I got to play with some of their tools. My favourite was the Urban Bone Machete, Mark III. It was definitely the most comfortable for my grip. I also enjoyed the artwork, which included lots of bloody fingers. The creators are Maxon and Joey.
We were even invited to a Zombie Tool fight. I must admit, although I was excited to see it, we got distracted with friends, beer and really good food.
We were even invited to a Zombie Tool fight. I must admit, although I was excited to see it, we got distracted with friends, beer and really good food.
13.1.11
The Silliest Things
Include falling. Do you fall? I trip a lot. Mostly going up stairs. Occasionally headed down, but only if the stair is a bit slippery and maybe I’m wearing socks, or heels. But up? Gets me all the time. There is this thing with having to actually put one’s foot all the way on the step and maintain balance, or not catch the tip of your foot on a pant leg. The latter seems to be the culprit a lot lately. Even when I’m not on stairs, but particularly when I am on stairs. For example, Monday I fell up the stairs twice.
Yes, twice in one day. Once to start my day and once to finish it.
We have lovely evil stairs heading up to our offices. Debi is the lucky one who sits at the top of the stairs and gets to see everyone come and go. Monday she saw me arrive loaded down with bags. I had a giant bag which contained workout clothes and shoes, some belated Christmas gifts, and paperwork. I also had my overflowing purse which doesn’t shut anymore because my keys are too big, and a gift bag with another belated Christmas present. Of course, at the very top step I fall. Not just trip, mind you, but flat out hands on the carpet with bags a flyin’. To be honest I think I found it a lot more funny then Debi.
And then at approximately 9:30 Monday evening, about 20 minutes after receiving a text from Jethro telling me to be careful of the stairs (which makes this one the funniest because he did not know about the earlier incident) I fell on my way to my bedroom to change. This one was just two or three steps up, which seems to happen a lot at home, so I wonder if that step has it out for me. Which I don’t really understand unless I somehow offended it when I moved in. Maybe I accidently skipped it a time or two.
Other silly things include getting water on one’s pants at a sink. It’s actually a pet peeve of mine, because I always seem to be the one who leans into it. So if you are ever in a public restroom with me you’ll probably want to look away awkwardly as I use the paper towels to wipe down the puddles of water all over the counter, usually while muttering about messy people and their lack of respect for the uncoordinated or short. I mean it is bad enough being the right height to get water all over your pants, but if I were five? I’d have gotten water in my armpits!
I also got water all over my pants Monday morning immediately after falling up the stairs. Fortunately, I didn’t wet myself. But I did throw water everywhere whilst trying to rinse out the coffee pot.
My lack of coordination is mostly the likely the reason I love physical comedy. Give me Inspector Clousseau catching his fingers in a spinning globe, Matthew Perry running into sliding glass doors, or Dan Akroyd’s Julia Child skit any day.
Yes, twice in one day. Once to start my day and once to finish it.
We have lovely evil stairs heading up to our offices. Debi is the lucky one who sits at the top of the stairs and gets to see everyone come and go. Monday she saw me arrive loaded down with bags. I had a giant bag which contained workout clothes and shoes, some belated Christmas gifts, and paperwork. I also had my overflowing purse which doesn’t shut anymore because my keys are too big, and a gift bag with another belated Christmas present. Of course, at the very top step I fall. Not just trip, mind you, but flat out hands on the carpet with bags a flyin’. To be honest I think I found it a lot more funny then Debi.
And then at approximately 9:30 Monday evening, about 20 minutes after receiving a text from Jethro telling me to be careful of the stairs (which makes this one the funniest because he did not know about the earlier incident) I fell on my way to my bedroom to change. This one was just two or three steps up, which seems to happen a lot at home, so I wonder if that step has it out for me. Which I don’t really understand unless I somehow offended it when I moved in. Maybe I accidently skipped it a time or two.
Other silly things include getting water on one’s pants at a sink. It’s actually a pet peeve of mine, because I always seem to be the one who leans into it. So if you are ever in a public restroom with me you’ll probably want to look away awkwardly as I use the paper towels to wipe down the puddles of water all over the counter, usually while muttering about messy people and their lack of respect for the uncoordinated or short. I mean it is bad enough being the right height to get water all over your pants, but if I were five? I’d have gotten water in my armpits!
I also got water all over my pants Monday morning immediately after falling up the stairs. Fortunately, I didn’t wet myself. But I did throw water everywhere whilst trying to rinse out the coffee pot.
My lack of coordination is mostly the likely the reason I love physical comedy. Give me Inspector Clousseau catching his fingers in a spinning globe, Matthew Perry running into sliding glass doors, or Dan Akroyd’s Julia Child skit any day.
12.1.11
Case in Point
just to make sure I've been outdone again...I received a package from Chelsea last night with the following:
and the wristies!
she was kind enough to NOT make me feel worse and add the finger holes to the rest of the hand.
And they are in my favourite color. Aren't they lovely?!
Thank you, Chelsea!! I LOVE MY PRESSIES!
11.1.11
Being Outdone
My younger sister seems to always outdo me. I have to admit I take a certain amount of pride in this, because (although she might deny I had anything to do with it) I feel I prodded her a bit when she was younger. She used to be an awful priss. Sorry, Chelsea, but I still have lovely lovely visions of you in your sea foam green gorgeous prom dress when you were a freshman in high school.
I remember abject lessons in mouthing back to your teachers, questioning authority, not giving into status quo, etc. (Yes, I know, from the woman working in special events who is now living in a cookie cutter town house). She ran away to Eugene a long time ago and has traveled from New York for acting classes to Costa Rica on a whim.
Where I am the type of person who is vaguely interested in knowing or doing something and decides to just figure it out the best I can on my own without trying to very hard, Chelsea actually learns how to do it.
A very great example is her visit right before Christmas. I make, and love to crochet, cute, simple single stitch “wristies”, which are fingerless gloves. They are made from a single rectangular piece of a certain width and length stitched together leaving a hole for the thumb. I thought myself very clever – as I cannot read patterns, nor do I have much desire to do so.
Chelsea has me try on a lovely pair of fingerless gloves, except they actually have cut off finger holes for each finger and the thumb, and they are ribbed in delightful ways and have stripes of color. I ohh and ahh and she says, “I have a ton of purple, how about I make you some in purple?” “You MADE THESE?!” And then in half disgust and half amusement I begin to laugh and show her a pair of mine, which are, of course, woefully childish in comparison.
And, again, it is with great pride and a slight twinge of jealously that I send you off to her blog. While I very much consider myself a writer (although why I STILL haven’t finished a book… that damn fear again) I will not delude myself into thinking I write anything of great depth – I’m much too silly most of the time to be bothered. So if you are looking for something intellectually stimulating you’ll want to visit her.
xoxo
I remember abject lessons in mouthing back to your teachers, questioning authority, not giving into status quo, etc. (Yes, I know, from the woman working in special events who is now living in a cookie cutter town house). She ran away to Eugene a long time ago and has traveled from New York for acting classes to Costa Rica on a whim.
Where I am the type of person who is vaguely interested in knowing or doing something and decides to just figure it out the best I can on my own without trying to very hard, Chelsea actually learns how to do it.
A very great example is her visit right before Christmas. I make, and love to crochet, cute, simple single stitch “wristies”, which are fingerless gloves. They are made from a single rectangular piece of a certain width and length stitched together leaving a hole for the thumb. I thought myself very clever – as I cannot read patterns, nor do I have much desire to do so.
Chelsea has me try on a lovely pair of fingerless gloves, except they actually have cut off finger holes for each finger and the thumb, and they are ribbed in delightful ways and have stripes of color. I ohh and ahh and she says, “I have a ton of purple, how about I make you some in purple?” “You MADE THESE?!” And then in half disgust and half amusement I begin to laugh and show her a pair of mine, which are, of course, woefully childish in comparison.
And, again, it is with great pride and a slight twinge of jealously that I send you off to her blog. While I very much consider myself a writer (although why I STILL haven’t finished a book… that damn fear again) I will not delude myself into thinking I write anything of great depth – I’m much too silly most of the time to be bothered. So if you are looking for something intellectually stimulating you’ll want to visit her.
xoxo
10.1.11
By Gosh and By Golly
A phrase I haven’t heard in very long time. It was said by a very sweet older woman during a meeting last week, and it has stuck with me. It made me giggle internally the moment it was said. “By gosh and by golly” is apropos to the feelings I’m trying to maintain with my resolutions: cheerful and determined.
I think in the 10 short days of the New Year I have already made progress in some areas, and in other areas fear still pervades. It is mostly the fear which comes from not knowing oneself or, at least, being unable to hear certain bits, as though searching for the transmission of truth but coming up with mostly static.
But, by gosh and by golly, I’m going to keep plugging away. Perhaps I’m not meant to know certain truths, because I have yet to reach that portion of the path, and when I do the transmission will come in loud and clear. Ahhhh, there it is. Facing the fear has a lot to do with faith. The trickiest part is when to go on faith alone and when to listen to the warning bells.
I think in the 10 short days of the New Year I have already made progress in some areas, and in other areas fear still pervades. It is mostly the fear which comes from not knowing oneself or, at least, being unable to hear certain bits, as though searching for the transmission of truth but coming up with mostly static.
But, by gosh and by golly, I’m going to keep plugging away. Perhaps I’m not meant to know certain truths, because I have yet to reach that portion of the path, and when I do the transmission will come in loud and clear. Ahhhh, there it is. Facing the fear has a lot to do with faith. The trickiest part is when to go on faith alone and when to listen to the warning bells.
5.1.11
So Far So Good
I won't lie and say I haven't had a couple of freak out moments where my thoughts run around in my head and then spew out in some terrified moment of trying to justify my feelings, but all in all the first five days of 2011 seem to be going well.
I have reinvigorated (with the prompting, of course, of Choo Choo) jogging and might I say that I do seem to get along well with treadmills. I have jogged two miles straight each time (none of those pesky walking breaks as the ground doesn't allow you to slow easily). I have been doing some relaxing yoga (but should note that not all of it is very relaxing and some of those poses I think broke my neck).
I have also been taking moments to do nothing at all. Like watching an entire movie without doing a craft through it. My hands did itch, as did my eye for a half hour or so, but in the end it was good.
Aurora and I made a fun drive into the big city last night and picked up some books. We picked up kindergarten level books for Aurora (Thomas the Train, Barbie and her horse - the exact one she owns, and Tangled). I found, unexpectedly, a collection of essays by Milan Kundera. And as soon as I finish my James Herriot "Every Living Thing" I'll be eager to begin.
Aurora has begun a couple of full days in kindergarten this week. She has been very excited. She enjoys numbers a lot and is doing very well with her math; she gets easily frustrated by words, which is a weird concept for me. But I'm trying to understand. I hope her new books which she picked out will help motivate her to try reading more herself (since we tend to read big books like Roald Dahl novels).
I hope your new year is off to a fantastic start!
I have reinvigorated (with the prompting, of course, of Choo Choo) jogging and might I say that I do seem to get along well with treadmills. I have jogged two miles straight each time (none of those pesky walking breaks as the ground doesn't allow you to slow easily). I have been doing some relaxing yoga (but should note that not all of it is very relaxing and some of those poses I think broke my neck).
I have also been taking moments to do nothing at all. Like watching an entire movie without doing a craft through it. My hands did itch, as did my eye for a half hour or so, but in the end it was good.
Aurora and I made a fun drive into the big city last night and picked up some books. We picked up kindergarten level books for Aurora (Thomas the Train, Barbie and her horse - the exact one she owns, and Tangled). I found, unexpectedly, a collection of essays by Milan Kundera. And as soon as I finish my James Herriot "Every Living Thing" I'll be eager to begin.
Aurora has begun a couple of full days in kindergarten this week. She has been very excited. She enjoys numbers a lot and is doing very well with her math; she gets easily frustrated by words, which is a weird concept for me. But I'm trying to understand. I hope her new books which she picked out will help motivate her to try reading more herself (since we tend to read big books like Roald Dahl novels).
I hope your new year is off to a fantastic start!
1.1.11
Part II: "...like I can feel the future on your skin"
There is something wondrous about today's date 1.1.11. Last year at this time I was alight with an anticipatory fire! I remember looking at the world with a tingling in my heart and mind. And people around the world (some of them were you, if you remember) were feeling the same thing. We all knew it was going to be a big year.
I think 2010 proved itself. Even if it was not in all the ways we imagined. Many of us lost loved ones, or were still dealing with the grief of our previous losses, situations arose and tested our values and, dare I say it, our resoluteness. Each of these tests made us look inward, whether we wanted to or not. For my part, I saw many dark corners and danger signs, but I also saw in the distance the beautiful garden and knew it was no time to be frozen with fear. I have been trying to thank you for allowing me to continue on my journey at my own pace and in the safety of your support (whether it be in your comments, or in your silence).
After the tantalizing anticipation of all 2010 would bring I am surprised to find I am not delirious going into 2011. Never fear, the New Year does not pale in comparison. I cannot succinctly describe the mood, but it as though the fire which was started last year and was so new is now a constant. Last year I was the kindling and it meant a lot of changes as the fire consumed layers upon layers. This year I AM the fire and it will be all about feeding the flames by taking things into me and breathing. Fire cannot exist without fuel and air and I have no intention of burning out.
My resolutions seem more ethereal and, therefore, have not necessarily been something I have felt capable of putting into "goal" form, but that is why I must stop and remember to look around. This path is still made of stone and dirt. My feet are still on solid ground no matter what the state of my spirit might be. So it seems, as ever, like Alice we must believe at least six impossible things.
I shall try not to mince words but get to the heart of my seemingly lofty "resolutions"
1. Face my fears (THEE guideline for 2011 and all other "goals").
2. Learn what causes unhealthy stress in my life and allow myself to deal with those issues directly.
3. Create healthy patterns of living.
4. Taking time to align my needs with my wants and creating plans to achieve.
5. Remember my spiritual awakening IS my path and the universe will never fail to guide me as long as I am open to the signs.
6. Love myself.
I have no doubt these things will only be accomplished through much reflection and continuing to look on the bright side of things, even if some of those things have been hiding under brambles and cobwebs for so very long.
I hope you'll join me for this new portion of the journey. There are many more crafts to be made, stairs to fall down, supernatural adventures to be had, margaritas to be drank, and sunshine to enjoy.
I think 2010 proved itself. Even if it was not in all the ways we imagined. Many of us lost loved ones, or were still dealing with the grief of our previous losses, situations arose and tested our values and, dare I say it, our resoluteness. Each of these tests made us look inward, whether we wanted to or not. For my part, I saw many dark corners and danger signs, but I also saw in the distance the beautiful garden and knew it was no time to be frozen with fear. I have been trying to thank you for allowing me to continue on my journey at my own pace and in the safety of your support (whether it be in your comments, or in your silence).
After the tantalizing anticipation of all 2010 would bring I am surprised to find I am not delirious going into 2011. Never fear, the New Year does not pale in comparison. I cannot succinctly describe the mood, but it as though the fire which was started last year and was so new is now a constant. Last year I was the kindling and it meant a lot of changes as the fire consumed layers upon layers. This year I AM the fire and it will be all about feeding the flames by taking things into me and breathing. Fire cannot exist without fuel and air and I have no intention of burning out.
My resolutions seem more ethereal and, therefore, have not necessarily been something I have felt capable of putting into "goal" form, but that is why I must stop and remember to look around. This path is still made of stone and dirt. My feet are still on solid ground no matter what the state of my spirit might be. So it seems, as ever, like Alice we must believe at least six impossible things.
I shall try not to mince words but get to the heart of my seemingly lofty "resolutions"
1. Face my fears (THEE guideline for 2011 and all other "goals").
2. Learn what causes unhealthy stress in my life and allow myself to deal with those issues directly.
3. Create healthy patterns of living.
4. Taking time to align my needs with my wants and creating plans to achieve.
5. Remember my spiritual awakening IS my path and the universe will never fail to guide me as long as I am open to the signs.
6. Love myself.
I have no doubt these things will only be accomplished through much reflection and continuing to look on the bright side of things, even if some of those things have been hiding under brambles and cobwebs for so very long.
I hope you'll join me for this new portion of the journey. There are many more crafts to be made, stairs to fall down, supernatural adventures to be had, margaritas to be drank, and sunshine to enjoy.
wishing you the very best New Year
xoxo
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